A roadblock is really a tricky beast. One day I feel I am making a lot of progress, and the next the voice in the back of my mind crawls up ever so close as I wake up the next morning to say “…you’re not even close!” Then it jumps onto my back, sinking its claws in deep with no intention of leaving anytime soon.
Lately, though full of events, places to go and people to see, I wake up today feeling like none of it really amounted to anything. Are these just pesky feelings of doubt? Or is it just me trying to sabotage myself into staying with the same old routine and guide myself back to a stale and comfortable life…Again?
That is not why I am here. I know I am meant for a greater purpose. Being a great person and not just a leader, but a supporter as well. Those feelings run deep, but somehow this little back-clutching parasite seems to find its way, making me feel like what I am doing currently holds no true worth. “Its not worth being known, you are not that interesting.”, ” Its not worth seeking out success because you will only fail”
When I write down what it says, I am able to recognize the stupidity of its resistance. As one of my last posts proved there is nothing to lose. And if I fail, guess what? I will continue to try and fail better next time.
My goal is to be a better self, more intelligent (haha, spell check just caught me on that word), more dynamic, and more adventurous! I want all this in the next 10 years. Hell, I could do it in 5 or less if I try.
We all have off days, and sometimes its good to take an off day and, literally, do absolutely nothing. You deserve a break every now and again; to recover mentally and physically to re conjure your passions.
I thought today was going to be one of those mentally off days, but its not. I still have that drive in me to accomplish all I can today because it is worth it. My dreams will not fall into my lap, someone will not just say “Here is a free trip to Italy” or “Here is a brain chip that makes you learn a new language instantly!” (Though that would be really awesome, where are those matrix rebels when you need them?!).
But alas, I have to work towards it. Day by day, inch by inch. :)
Have a Bright and fulfilling day!